It was

it was a while from here
it could not be and yet
I hungered for it as
a pigeon in the desert for a cloud

it was a whole life full
carefully planned and yet
it flew by steady as
an overweighted spermwhale on speed

it was destiny
not meant to come and yet
it was intruding every vein
this aphrodite junk could find

but above all,
it was true verity
closer to life as it is now
and never was after the shot wore out